Broken Forever Read online

  “Good. I like that you like it.” He wraps his arm around my shoulders and pulls me in, holding me there.

  “I’m tired. It’s been a long day.”

  “Why don’t you take a nap? We have about an hour till we get back to the bar.”

  “Brian?”

  “Yes, Lil?”

  “Thanks for trusting me and my ideas.” I tilt my head up, trying to gauge his reaction.

  A small smile creeps up on his face. “I should be the one thanking you for making my dream a reality. I told you what I wanted and you found it.” He leans down to give me a quick peck on my temple.

  I’m not going to read too much into this.

  Just as I’m about to close my eyes I get a text. I feel it before I can hear it. Searching my purse, I finally find the glow at the bottom of the bag.

  Daisy: I have an emergency. I need you.

  Me: This better be a real emergency.

  Daisy: Lilly, before you say no…Just say yes.

  Me: Tell me what it is.

  Daisy: I need you to babysit.

  Me: Forget it.

  Daisy: Please. Ruby misses her Aunt Lilly.

  Me: Not going to work.

  Daisy: Please, Lilly. I never ask you for anything.

  I promise you, I’ll be quick. Well as quick as

  I can be. I have to fly to St. Helena to get fitted

  for a dress.

  Me: Why do you have to go all the way to St.

  Helena?

  Daisy: Nat is getting married and she hired

  Mona from Enchanted to make our

  dresses.

  Me: No. You won’t be back.

  Daisy: Ferris said he hired a jet and we will be

  back by bed.

  Me: Fine. You owe me.

  Daisy: Like in favors? Scones? Money?

  Cause I can do one or all the above.

  Me: I’ll let you know when I need some-thing,

  but I will be cashing in.

  Daisy: Maybe we should negotiate instead.

  Me: See you in the morning.

  Daisy: *kissy face*

  Tucking my phone back into my purse, I lean back and give the loudest sigh.

  “You OK?”

  “Yes, everything is fine.” I start to recoil. Scooting over toward my side, I look out the window and watch the lights pass.

  “It doesn’t seem fine. Is there anything I can do to help?” He seems genuinely concerned, but the last thing I need is someone to help me through this.

  “Brian, I’m sorry, but this is a working relationship. Prying into my life won’t seal this partnership. If anything it jeopardizes it.” I get a little snippy, but I can’t help it. The closer people get the easier it is for them to hurt me when they leave — and they will leave.

  “Lil…,” he pleads.

  “My name is Lillian, please address me as such.”

  “I don’t know what your problem is, but I do know what you are doing. Pushing me away isn’t going to make me disappear. So lose whatever it is that is going on in that pretty little head of yours and relax.”

  Turning my head back around, I meet his eyes so he can see what I’m saying. “Brian, don’t tell me what to do. You don’t know me. You have no clue what I’m going through or what I have been through.”

  “You’re right, but what I do know is if you don’t get out of your own head, you are going to self-destruct. Been there, done that.” He reaches out, but I slide both of my hands under my legs. It’s a totally childish move, but his touch may make me forget and I need to always remember.

  Feeling a buzzing between us, I reach for my purse, hoping it’s Daisy calling to cancel tomorrow. “Sorry babe, but it’s me.” He pulls his cell out of his pocket, pausing for a moment to see who it is. I can’t help but glance over his shoulder, Sam. “What’s up Sam?” It seems like it’s a few minutes before he is able to respond. “Can you call Jenn to have her come in and help? I’ll be back…” He glances at his watch. “In about 30 minutes. Can you hold down the fort until she gets there?” He looks over to me with an apologetic smile. “Good and Sam…break a leg.”

  “Problems?”

  “We are shorthanded at The Bar and Sam has to leave for a gig in 20 minutes. My plans were to drive you home, but I need to have the driver stop there first so I can help cover.”

  “It’s OK.” I don’t mean it. One minute I want to push him away, but the moment he goes away I want him near. Sometimes, I confuse the hell out of myself. “I’m only a few blocks away. I think I can manage.”

  “I know you can manage, but it’s late.” He reaches for my hand again and this time I let him hold it. “I’ll have the driver take you home.” He insists and I give up.

  The last 20 minutes of the ride are quiet. Too quiet. Both of us stare out our individual windows watching life pass by us, our hands intertwined between us. His thumb rubbing lazy circles gives me more comfort than what I deserve.

  “Lil.” Brian tugs on my hand, freeing me from my thoughts. “We’re here. I have to go, but I’ll call you tomorrow.”

  “Sounds good. I’ll go over some of the financials tonight and draw something up for you to review.”

  “That works too. Thanks again.” Brian leans forward to tip the driver. “Make sure she gets home safe.” He gets out and makes a run for the door, only turning back for a few seconds for a quick goodbye glance before the car pulls away.

  Chapter 6

  Lillian

  “STOP THE CAR!” I shout a little louder than necessary, surprising myself and I’m sure scaring the driver. He slams on the brakes, sending me crashing into his seat. I must have unbuckled when we stopped. “I need out.”

  Rushing up to the door I notice my reflection in the window. I look different. My hair is disheveled and makeup is worn off. Normally this would be me looking tired, but this look is something else entirely.

  Taking a deep breath, I open the door to a packed venue. Tables are full, bar is packed and a line is forming at the door. Squeezing by, I look for Brian.

  “Miss, the line is back there.” A middle-aged man points to the end of the line.

  “Oh, I’m not here to eat —” I try to explain before I’m cut off.

  “She’s working the bar, Bill.” Misty grabs me by the arm, stuffing an apron in my hands, then hollers over her shoulder. “I promise, ten more minutes and your table will be ready.”

  “I’m going to hold you to that,” Bill shouts back.

  “Thank you so much for helping me. Do you know where to find Brian?”

  “You’re welcome, but I was serious. We need your help. Sam had to leave.” Misty hurries me to the bar area.

  “Misty! I can’t. I’ve never made a drink in my life.”

  “I find it hard to believe The Lillian Richards has never opened a bottle of wine or popped a top.” She stops to give me a look.

  “Well yes, I have, but I wouldn’t even know where to begin here.” I try my hardest to get out of this mess I got myself into. I should have just let the driver take me home.

  “Turn around.” She grabs me by the shoulders and turns me so my back is facing her front, tying the apron on. “There, you are ready to go.”

  “Wh-what? No! Just no. I can’t do this.” I’m trying hard to convince her because the thought of waiting on all those people freaks me out. I bark orders at people, I don’t take them.

  “Please…you will be fine. Rein in those fears and conquer those orders.” Misty gives me a little push behind the bar and walks off.

  Standing there looking at the crowd, I become numb, lost as to where to even begin. Voices are screaming out orders and people are hollering at me trying to get my attention.

  “Hey lady! You going to get us drinks or what?”

  “We don’t have all night.”

  “What’s her problem?”

  Closing my eyes, I take a few seconds to get into my survival mode. When I open them back up, Brian is standing there, facin
g me.

  “Lil, what are you doing here? I thought the driver took you home.”

  “I just wanted to talk to you for a minute, but I guess I’m helping now,” I confess. I wait for him to ask me what I wanted to talk about, but instead he turns around and smiles at the crowd.

  “CAN I GET YOUR ATTENTION, PLEASE?” Brian brings his hand up to his mouth, calling out to the crowd, and they all stop talking to listen to him. “Lillian is new here. She was on her way home and stopped by because she heard you all were in need of some drinks. So how about we introduce ourselves. Lillian, this is The Bar, The Bar this is Lil, your beer goddess for the evening…tell her, hi.”

  And just like that, the whole bar says, “Hi Lil!”

  Brian peeks over at me, grins from ear to ear and winks. “She is only here for one night. So make sure you treat her right so she comes back again. Got it?”

  They all nod, give shout outs and whistle, basically giving me a little room for errors tonight.

  Brian walks over to stand in front of me again. Bending at the knees to make us eye level, he says, “Lil, you got this. Take the orders. You know how to make simple drinks. Anything that is a little more complicated just shout it out to me. Tonight we will have to move together as a team.” He searches my eyes to make sure I’m OK. “You got this.”

  “I got this,” I repeat his words.

  “You do, now get to work.” He spins me around to face the crowd and smacks me on the butt causing me to squeal.

  “Hey now!” I give him a playful look and smile.

  Approaching the crowd, I throw my insecurities out the window and allow my confidence to come front and center — thanks to Brian. “OK, who’s first?”

  Chapter 7

  Brian

  Never in a million years did I think Lillian Richards would walk through that door and help out a guy like me, especially by slinging drinks at The Bar. I left her in the car, told the driver to take her home and even watched him pull off, but here she is an hour after closing, helping us clean up.

  “Hey, Brian, have you heard from Sam?” Misty comes around the corner, with a tray of condiments to restock the tables for tomorrow. “Just curious if that producer came to watch.”

  “Yeah, Sam was stoked. He liked what he saw and scheduled a meeting for early next week to discuss collaborating.” I recall the text I got from her a few minutes ago, which was followed by a crazy-ass GIF. It seems to be the only way she communicates nowadays.

  “Do you think this guy is legit?” Misty’s wiping off the tables as she goes, a routine she has down pat.

  “Not sure, but I plan to find out.” I finish mopping the floor around the bar area, cleaning up the sticky mess from drinks spilled throughout the night.

  “What a good big bro—” Misty starts to say, but I hold up a finger.

  “Do you hear that?”

  “Oh yeah…Lillian is doing the dishes.” Misty says it like this is just a normal activity for Lil.

  “You left her alone in there? Doing dishes?” I’m dumbfounded. I rush into the kitchen expecting to see Lillian overwhelmed with the mounds of dishes, confused on how to operate the dishwasher, but what I actually see surprises me.

  Lillian, who is usually so put together and uptight, has the music cranked up and is swaying and singing along. Her hair is piled on top of her head, heels kicked off and by the looks of it, is wearing my board shorts I leave in the bar for a grab-and-go emergency. So hot.

  Leaning against the door frame I watch her, mesmerized. She’s formed a routine to the rhythm of the beat. Plate, spray, stack, plate, spray, stack. Hips swaying back and forth, eyes closed for a moment as she sings the melody about touching with slow hands, speeding up, making her sweat — everything I want to do to her at this very moment, seeing her so raw and vulnerable. Opening her eyes, she grabs the hose to spray the next plate, but instead catches sight of me and stands still like a deer caught in headlights.

  Instead of speaking she opts for the stare down. I right myself to settle in. This is a game she will not win. Reacting to my actions, she stands up taller, griping the nozzle tighter in her hands.

  After a minute or so, I decide to let her win after all and break the silence. “What happened to your clothes?”

  “They got wet. I found these in the office over there.” She gives a little tug on the waist of the shorts.

  “They look good on you, but I’m afraid I need those back. They are my lucky surfing shorts.” I hold out my hand, daring her to give them back now.

  “No can do, Bri. You see, I’m afraid they are my lucky shorts now.” She winks.

  “Nope, pretty sure you wearing them, still makes me lucky.”

  “You sure about that?” she teases. I’m loving every minute of our banter. This is a far cry from the uptight businesswoman who ended up on the other side of my door this morning.

  “One hundred percent.” I nod.

  Gripping the hose a little tighter, she squints her eyes at me as if she is daring me to take another step. “Have it your way,” she says, shrugging her shoulders, and I should know what’s going to happen, but I can’t help but watch the strain of her chest against the heavy weight of her wet tank top.

  “What the hell?” Water sprays me right in the crotch of my pants. Then works its way up, my chest the next victim. Holding my hands out to the side, I close my eyes and let her have her way with me because after this, I’m going to be doing the same. “You done?” I open one eye, testing my grounds.

  “Yep!” She’s now wearing a satisfied, shit-eating grin.

  “Good. Now let’s get this cleaned up.” I walk over to her and pry the nozzle out of her hands. “Shouldn’t take too long since you have done the majority of them already.”

  “That was the plan.” She picks up a new stack and loads them on the rack to be cleaned.

  “It was a good plan, but you didn’t have to do them. You already helped out enough tonight.”

  “I wanted to help.” Her voice is softer now.

  “Can I just ask you a question?” I turn to her, silently daring her to say “yes.”

  Turning toward me she folds her arms across her chest and leans against the sink. “One. Just one question.”

  “How did The Lillian Richards learn to wash dishes?” I laugh. She doesn’t. Shit.

  Still standing in front of me, she looks at me. Standing. Looking. Not moving. Then like the water ninja she has become, Lillian plunges her hand in the soapy water and splashes some in my direction. Once again, I’m drenched and suds are everywhere.

  “You better run little girl. Paybacks are a bitch.” I grab a pitcher from a nearby shelf and fill it up.

  “You are mistaken, little boy. If I recall right, I’m a good five years older than you.”

  “Four years,” I shoot back.

  “Brian, put the pitcher down.”

  “No can do, Lil.” I close the distance between us. A few more steps and she won’t have anywhere to go.

  “Not fair. I already got wet once today and had to change.” She begins to whine.

  “Was that when you barged back into my apartment and saw me in all my glory?” I bark out a laugh.

  “Hardy-har.” She tilts her head to the side, closing her eyes into tiny slits showing me exactly how funny she thinks I am.

  “I thought you would like that.”

  “I did. Now you tell me, does the sight of me make you wet?”

  “Lil, didn’t you learn this in fifth grade health? Women get wet, men get hard.” I lift the pitcher of water above my head, ready to drench her from top to bottom.

  “I vaguely recall that, but I’m pretty sure you are…” Her eyes suddenly widen with excitement.

  “Ohhhhhh! What in the…” The pitcher of water I held above my head is now on me. At first I think my little water ninja can move at lightening speeds, but when I look up at the pitcher I see Misty’s arm snake back around the corner.

  “Wet,” Lillian finishes a
s Misty comes in, doubled over in laughter.

  “Girl power!” Misty gives Lil a fist bump.

  “You two…” I growl.

  “Nope…your game is over.” Misty decides she is the one who is adulting at the moment. “You guys created this mess, you will clean it up.” She walks over to the back door, grabbing her purse along the way. “I’m out of here. I have a final I need to study for.”

  “Bye, Misty!” Lil and I holler back in unison.

  After Misty leaves, Lillian looks around, and a worried look overtakes her once playful smile. “Oh my God! What did I do?” She heads toward the closet. “I’m such an idiot. Where’s a mop?”

  Not willing to let her retreat back to the ice-cold Lillian, I run up behind her, careful not to slip in the mess we created. “Hey now, it’s only water.” I grab her elbow and gently turn her to face me. “This was the most fun I’ve had in a long time. Besides, between the two of us and a couple of mops over there, this mess will be gone in 15 minutes tops.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “Sorry for what? For helping me out, smiling and letting loose? Because I find all that sexy as hell.”

  “OK I’m not sorry, but let’s get this done so I can get home.”

  “You aren’t going anywhere. You are soaking wet and the clothes you borrowed don’t even fit you. There is no way I’m allowing you to go home like that,” I say firmly. “Upstairs I have a spare bedroom and dry clothes.”

  “I don’t even have the energy to fight with you. Dry clothes and a bed sound good. Do you think we can up the ante and throw in a hot shower as well?” Her smile is back in place.

  “I thought you would never ask. Hot shower sounds great.”

  “Alone, Brian. Let me explain this in a way you will understand…me, hot shower. You, cold shower.”

  “You drive a hard bargain, but deal accepted.” I hold out my hand to shake on it.

  She holds her hand out and I grab it, pulling her close enough that she can feel a cold shower is very much needed. “Don’t mistake me accepting your deal for not wanting you…everything about you right now makes me want to strip you down right here, right now and show you exactly how bad I want you.” As quickly as the words are out, my mouth claims hers, taking over her mouth the way I want to take her.